Around Town

By the time you’re 80 years old, you’ve learned everything. Then all you have to do is remember it! Good luck and here are some suggestions that might help you. A N D ON THAT SAME TOPIC: Your parents were the most important people in the family.

By John Bill Martin Staff Writer One of the more popular expressions knocked around by people in my age group (OLD!!) is “used to be.” That is certainly true of our mothers, past and present.

By John Bill Martin Staff Writer Note how seemingly “innocent” entries can be turned against us! 1.  LONGTERM PARKING Some people left their car in the long-term parking at the airport while away, and someone broke into the car.

This is a mental fitness evaluation for people who are considering retirement or for those already retired and might be experiencing second thoughts. If you get one right, you are doing OK. If you get none right, you might better go for counseling. (I’ll meet you there). 1.

At the hospital, the relatives gathered in the waiting room where a family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. “I’m afraid I am the bearer of bad news,” he told the group. “The only hope for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.

I just want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery. I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.

The season for Trick or Treating is upon us and whether you are the giver or the getter, it is sometimes a stressful time for all. But for those of us of a certain age, there is a good time to give up the getting part of it. Top 10 reasons you know you are too old to Trick or Treat when: 10.

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.          “One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me,” said one boy.

Staff Writer Here’s a little factoid automo - tive buffs or just to dazzle your friends about one of the creature comforts that we take for granted, unless it doesn’twork. The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner.

You don’t have to be a Bill Gates-type millionaire to have a more valuable commodity: Common sense. How ‘bout these observations? 1. Life is not fair. Get used to it. 2. The world won’t care about your self-esteem.